Monday, December 04, 2006

Oh... That Unexpected... Unwanted Spanking

Many of you must have thought me dead, after not popping my head out into the blogland for so long. Well, luckily enough, school and other crap haven't managed to kill me. Not just yet.

I am interrupting my project writing for a quick bloggy. hehe I would have posted this weekend, but guess what? A stupid neighbor played this Friday with my cables and my Internet and HBO were gone in an instant. So today the guy from the cable company came to solve the problem.

I'm actually writing in order to talk about my spanking this Friday. Or was it Saturday? Who cares? It was weekend and my late mood was being reflected in my bitchy attitude towards everything and everyone. I have worked, second time now, on a project that was intended for five people. Who did the whole work? I did. Why? Once, cause I didn't want those newcomers on my team, but they pushed their way in, and two, how can you trust with your grade someone you don't know? Thus, I did the project. Again. I'm just pissed that some people do the work and others get the good grades. Period.

So on Friday or Saturday, after being almost finished with the project, Jack though I needed a spanking. I laughed in his face, like many other times last week. It was a grin saying "you better not touch me or else you are dead meat". He insisted on "it's up to me not to you when you need it". The statement didn't turn me on. I just didn't want a spanking. I swear I didn't. And it wasn't that "I didn't want" that happens to be "I want". It was the "didn't want" that I have made sure to be so after deeply scanning the insides of my brain and moods. I - DID - NOT - WANT - A - SPANKING. Clear enough. I was ready to bite Jack's head off at this point.

He spanked me alright. I hated it for awhile. I faught back again and again, meaning every push and every scratch and every kick. I scratched his face by mistake though, while pushing away his head. He was trying to bite my butt. If you bite my butt or my tits you make me cry out of fear.

Let me tell you dear spankos that we are wrong when we assume that spankings do not really hurt. They hurt but in a nice way, you're saying? No. They hurt and that's that. If you're not in the mood, they hurt like shit. It's not pleasure, no fucking endorphins running wild, just pure pain. I covered my butt in desperation while Jack was trying to calm me down with a spanking. The more he slapped, the wilder I got. He was so puzzled, poor guy. I mean he was spanking me for my own good, right? Not because he likes it; because he thinks I need it.

Half way through he was so exasparated he went to get the hairbrush. He couldn't find it so he settled for the belt. I didn't count them. It was hurting. I started crying. Sobbing like mad, but crying silently. Not out of pain, like I said. Out of the frustration that I couldn't stop something that was painful and scary.

Jack tried everything to get me to enjoy the spanking: keywords, slaps, playful stuff, control related issues. No result. A few slaps later he gave up. My butt was extremely hot. I had a few marks but they wore out till today.

The whole point of this post is to give you a spanking story, because it happened and I should be phony not to mention it on my blog, and second, to make you aware that spanking is fucking painful when you don't want it.

Sure, it did happen before for me not to want a spanking but then get really wet during one. But this time... this time I was blank. As blank as a guy who has his mind on sex and his company's pressing issues. I don't know how it happened while I do know why it happened. It's just frustrating to know that it happened. Oh well... have fun in your spanking world. My spanking mood is ... a mood.



Tiggr said...

Hiya Sis!!!!

SO glad to hear you're still alive and haven't fallen out of the tree or jumped out the window.

But sad to hear about this spanking... you ARE a control freak, aren't you, love... let it go... please? Jack just wanted you to let it go and make it all better for a few minutes, to put you in a happier place.

I'm sorry it didn't work for you, but sorry too for Jack... that's a hell of a place to be... between a bitchy rock and a very hard, cold, lonley place...

I miss you!!!!!! Come back to us when you can... please? If not about spanking, then anything you have to say... I love it all!

Love you always,

lessa{D} said...

hiya my sweet fellow brat...

I am sooooooooo sorry... cuddles, love and hugsssssss... for that damn project.. being Miss Perfect... ohhh yes.. I am like that at my work... awful sometimes... 'nobody can do it as I want it only me' attitude... and that means coming home exhausted... just wanting to cuddle up and be pampered... and for sure not spanked...

like wise Tiggs I am sorry for the both off you... for you cause it wasn't working.. and for Jack cause he sure meant to get you off the world and out the stress.... and sometimes it just doesn't work...

I've been there also... and cried, yelled I hate you... not so sweet and nice...

do take care...

love ya...


Theresa said...

I'm sorry things are so stressful. Sorry your spanking didn't go so well. We have missed you, but we understand about real life.

Here's lots of hugs, a well wishes!

We'll be here whenever you want to post!

love ya

Haron said...

Who on earth thinks spanking doesn't hurt? *boggles*

Thank you for posting about when things don't go great as well as about when they're smooth. {{{hugs}}}

Emma Kaufmann said...

Hi sweetie, just found your blog. Sorry you had such a not so good spanking experience. But as you say, your man thought you needed it, and maybe you did :)

New Beginnings said...

I haven't gotten to this point yet so I was wondering were you mad at Jack, are you mad at Jack? I think this is what my husband worries about sometimes, that I truly won't be in the mood and he won't know if I am serious or not. I guess I don't know myself.


Tiggr said...

OK, I've got to jump back in here cause of PK's worries... I've been in this position before a couple of times... and he truly didn't know it at the time... once he knew cause I stopped him, totally the wrong way... our one truly classic case of everything to do wrong in a spanking...

But we learned, mostly I learned. And yeah, if I am not feeling at least 80% OK with Dante or toward him... if there is any hidden resentment or anger or anything negative at all, it can easily come out this way and at this time...

I love you so much... just hope you're OK, I wish I had an email easier for you to use/access... but please email me! Would still love to chat on the phone, too *grins*

Love and kisses and cuddles,

Paul said...

O dear Kay, difficult situation for both of you. How do you tell your H o H or Dom that you really don't wan't a spanking.
The only way that I can think of is a safe word.
I hope that you and Jack can sort it.
Warm hugs,

Spice said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Spice said...

Oh poor Kay... :( And poor Jack. Sounds like it wasn't a good experience for either of you. I hope things get better - you sound stressed out beyond belief! We're here whenever you wanna let off some steam...


Lily said...

Hi Kay,

Just dropping to play catch up and say hello.

I hope your next spanking is a better experience for you both.

Take care,



Tigger said...

Hi babe,

Just stopping in again to see if you're still alive... miss you, me at least, K?

Love and hugs!

lessa{D} said...

hey sweet fellow brat...

just leaving loads of weekend hugssssssss for you... hope everything is ok....


Amber said...

Boy, reading this I'm sure glad that I don't get a spanking when I don't want it. Sometimes it's nice to have a vanilla partner, I guess. Although it's hard for me to think of a time when I don't want it.

It always puzzles me how complex is many people's relationship with spanking as such.

Hope you are feeling better.

Ree said...

I'm sorry that you got a spanking that was not a good one. I have had that happen and it is so confusing and I felt so bad for Rowan because I was so angry and sad and all he wanted to do was help.

lots of love hun,


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