To be fair to my mother, she knew of my preoccupation from the saucy little
drawings and bits of original punishment prose I wasn't careful enough in
hiding. And the reality of her own childhood spanking fantasies (disclosed to me
in later life) may well have figured in her reluctance to ever put me over her
knee. When I was 14, she privately confronted me one day with a naughty
paperback (I didn't waste much time in doing all I could to obtain related text
and images) I'd forgotten in the bathroom. To my face, she asked me if I felt
I'd "missed out by never getting a bare bottom spanking." I melted in a puddle
of shame and was told to stop being silly.
I wonder if my Mom knew my interests? I assume she did. My journal, my normal stories were filled with spanking moments. I think I got deeper and better only when I wrote these bits. I also know she read many of them. So I'm just curious what she thought of them. But I'll never find out. And I'm happy with that.
Sometimes, when she talks to the cats, I have the feeling that she was into it too. And if that is the case, can spanking be, hereditary? Can there be more to it than a state of mind? Even if we develope the interest around four or five, the predisposition has to exist, thus something biological too. Of course, I tend to believe that it's all related to the mind, but things like this just make me wonder. Can there really be something in our genes that makes us susceptible of catching the spanking virus?